Shabbat Gathering: What’s Yizkor?

Dear Chevrei, as is our custom, we will gather tonight at 5.45p ct to welcome Shabbat. These are the coordinates:

Zoom
Meeting ID: 963 5113 1550
Password: 1989
Phone: +1 312 626 6799

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Here we go.

There are several moments during our Yom Kippur services that stick in my mind all year long: the blowing of the shofar marking the end of the day’s services, the Al Chet (the confession of our sins), and especially the Yizkor service in the afternoon. Shaarei Shamayim has a particular minhag (tradition, way of doing things) that might be unique. This is what it's all about.

Remembering the departed.

Yizkor is the service where we remember those who have died. The word yizkor means "to remember." Yizkor is about our belief that our prayers and actions can help and comfort the souls of those who have preceded us into the afterlife. Regarding our actions that can help the departed, we have a mission from G!d to make the world a kinder, more beautiful, and better place and this mission is called olam chesed yibaneh, “to build a world of kindness.” (If you’ve been to our Shabbat Gathering, you know we sing the prayer Olam Chesed every week.) And beside attending the Yizkor service, some of us light 24-hour Yahrzeit candles at home.

Shaarei Shamayim’s minhag.

As I mentioned above, Shaarei Shamayim has a special and beautiful custom and I believe the custom originated with our fellow congregant Z0e Werth. This is how it goes: A large tray is placed on a table in front of those assembled for the service and is partially filled with water. Beside it is a bowl full of stones. During the Yizkor service, people come up to the tray and place a stone in the tray while saying the name of the person they are remembering. The water rises until it is almost brimming over. I’m not sure about the intended symbolism of our tradition, but I imagine that the water represents our tears and as we remember our loved ones the tears well up until they’re brimming over. It’s moving to watch people pick up a stone, say a name, and then place the stone in the tray.

The evil eye.

There’s a superstition that, if your parents are alive, you don’t attend Yizkor. Attending might bring on the ayin ha-ra, the evil eye, by seeing and hearing others express their grief and the evil eye might visit your parents. Many, many people don’t believe in this superstition and attend to show their support of the others who must attend.

Hugs.

Maybe I’ll see you during Yom Kippur services. If you see me first, please come by and say, “hello.” I want to catch up with you and find out how you’re doing. And if we see each other at Yiskor, let’s give each other a hug and remember together those we’ve lost.

And may it be for all of us a blessing.

See you tonight!
Gut Shabbes!

All my love,
brian.

PS

The trailer for the new biopic of Leonard Bernstein:

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