Shabbat Gathering: Overturn the patriarchy -- now!

Dear Chevra, as is our custom, we will gather tonight at 5.45p ct to welcome Shabbat. These are the coordinates:

Zoom  
Meeting ID: 963 5113 1550  
Password: 1989  
Phone: +1 312 626 6799  

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But first...

Maria has contributed her famous challah recipe to our growing cookbook. You can read it here. And if you have any recipe you'd like to contribute, please let me know.

Here we go.

When I was a child growing up in the Presbyterian church, G-d was the old man with the long grey beard modeled pretty much from Michelangelo’s image on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. Then, to make matters even more masculine, G-d had a son. (The Holy Ghost was probably a man too, but I never got that deep.) These days, the patriarchy in Judaism is still dragging my chosen faith further and further out of touch and I resent that.

Torah: men behaving badly.

Torah is full of men behaving badly. Take a look at Abraham. Twice (!) he asks Sarah to pose as his sister so he won't be killed by the rulers of the countries they passed through. (Never mind what happened to Sarah.) One of those countries was Egypt and, in at least in one midrash I’ve read, the Israelites were enslaved in Egypt because of Abraham’s deception. And that’s just Abraham. If negative role models count too, then we have plenty to draw from.

Not too long ago, I wrote about how the bat mitzvot in America is only 100 years old. The first American woman rabbi was ordained only 50 years ago. The matriarchs were added to our liturgy in my lifetime. Our liturgy, for many Jews, has been scrubbed of gendered language. And our leadership, in and beyond the pulpit, is increasingly female. Maybe we can look at this from a glass half full perspective and call it progress. But I look at the glass and see it is half empty and feel real change is overdue.

Far be it from me to propose what needs to happen next. I’m not an expert on Judaism or gender, but I do know what I’m doing in my own little world. I’m studying more women Torah commentators. It’s a promise I made myself last High Holy Days. I have The Torah: A Women's Commentary (2007) and have made it part of my weekly study. Through Hadar, I’m taking classes predominately led by women. And, in general, I’m keeping my mouth closed and listening to female and non-binary voices.

We need more opinions from women baked into our beliefs. Take Talmud. Talmud is an open source document and we need to act on that, not just mouth the words. Talmud was originally written by men for men, and some of Talmud is hideously misogynistic. (Just ask Stormy, our resident Talmud scholar.) In my opinion, we need to call out horrible texts AND offer our own instead to replace the bad ones. The men who wrote the Talmud were men of their time and offered opinions for their time. And there’s no excuse for those opinions in 2022. Zero. And this isn’t just the responsibility of women. It’s the responsibility for all of us. I can probably tell when something is misogynistic. See something, say something.

And, while we’re at it, let’s not leave anyone behind. All the non-binary folks need to be lifted up too. If we’re going to get this right, then let’s get it right for everybody.

So, I'll support reproductive rights, equal pay for equal work, the end of violence against women and non-binary people, parental leave that makes sense, safe and affordable childcare, and so much more. Make no mistake about it: There's a war being waged against women and non-binary people and history will remember what side we stand on.

And may it be for all of us a blessing.
See you tonight!
Gut Shabbes!

All my love,
brian.