Shabbat Gathering: Lech Lecha and patting myself on the back.

Gud Shabbos Khaveyrim, as is our custom, we will gather tonight at 5.45p ct to welcome Shabbat. These are the coordinates:

Zoom
Meeting ID: 883 8469 4181
Password: 822665
Phone: +1 312 626 6799

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Author's Note: I wrote this to be published last week but national events changed the plan and I did something else instead. As I am loath to waste my efforts, I'm publishing it this week. Hope you don't mind.

Here we go.

Last week’s parsha was Lech Lecha, and it was my bar mitzvah portion. I was an adult bar mitzvah at my synagogue in California, Congregation Beth Emek. Rabbi Richard “Rick” Winer officiated as he had for my conversion. The bar mitzvah was a peak experience in my life and, if you are even slightly considering an adult b’nei mitzvah, I highly recommend it.

For me, the process took about a year. My rabbi announced he was saving Lech Lecha for adult b’nei mitzvah students and that sign ups were available. Three of us signed up.

I got some software called Trope Trainer to help me learn the portion and prayers. I used Trope Trainer when it was a software program that came on a CD. Now, of course, just like everything else, it’s a web app and I don’t have any experience with that version. But when I used it, Trope Trainer was AMAZING. I can’t help but think it’s gotten better.

I also got a tutor. As I’m the type of person who goes all in when he signs up for a project, I chose the “hardest” tutor in the synagogue, someone with a reputation for not putting up with any guff and didn’t cut a student any slack. (She was also a family friend and tutored my first daughter for her her bat mitzvah.) I met with her every Sunday for almost a year and working with her was fantastic. (Thanks Wendy.)

I was absolutely committed to doing a good job. All my friends were going to be there and my in-laws were flying in from NYC. I was determined not to embarrass myself. My beit din and mikva were in private, of course, and there hadn’t been an “official” recognition of my conversion in the synagogue. For me, my bar mitzvah was the moment when I really “came out” as a Jew and celebrated.

My father-in-law gave me a tallis when I converted and I was very proud of it. (Still am.) After I converted, I wore it to every Torah service. Then, when I started the conversion process, the rabbi told me not to wear it anymore until the day of my bar mitzvah. That was difficult. It was like being demoted. But sometimes I’m compliant and I stopped wearing it. I teared up when my father-in-law re-presented me with my tallis at my bar mitzvah.

When it was time to chant Torah, I went first. I nailed it, did a great job. I have a pretty good voice, so I sounded good and I chanted loudly and proudly so everyone would know how hard I worked. I was terrific. --No brag. Just fact. --Maybe now it's your turn.

And may it be for all of us a blessing.

See you tonight!
Gut Shabbes!

All my love,
brian.